Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize