I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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