There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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