i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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