I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
