isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
