fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
