No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
