I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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