a queef is a wish your heart makes.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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