i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
