Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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