So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
