who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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