I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
