Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
