Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
