You can't motorboat a personality
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
