Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
