i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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