do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
