i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
this will be a night to untag.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize