ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize