I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
