I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
