whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
