I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I enjoy the company of your penis
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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