Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
