these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
