we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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