I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
