your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Dignity is for republicans.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
