Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
