Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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