Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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