Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize