Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize