she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
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