It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Quick, to the slutcave!
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
