This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
My balls are so social today.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
