I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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