How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Randomize
