I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
