when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
