He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Randomize
