You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
