I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I got inside last night via doggy door
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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