Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
