I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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