You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize