guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
