Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
