Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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