Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
